Setting our goals in alignment with the values of His Kingdom
Christ is Born!
Glorify Him!
Happy New Year!
Boy…there sure is a lot going on right now, and it is so easy to get caught up in all the hubbub around the holidays. Whether you’re on the new or old calendar, I’m guessing you still are celebrating the crown of the year, the time where we all look at the calendar year that just passed and look ahead to the year to come.
Like so many, I’m deep in a season of asking myself: what do I want this next year to look like? What changes do I want to make?
In other words, how can I more fully repent?
Yes, folks - I’m talking about New Year’s resolutions.
Of course, after the holidays (and for you old calendar folks — you’ll know soon enough) there’s always the dream of dropping 15 pounds by February 15. This year, I swear I’m going to the gym four times a week. Watch me.
Resolutions, however, take all shapes and sizes, relating to many different spheres.
Financial goals may include finally paying off that debt that has been lingering for years.
Family goals may include taking that vacation you’ve been putting off.
Faith goals may include making it to church more regularly or getting involved in the men’s or women’s group you’ve been intending to join.
Whatever the case may be, these resolutions speak to a deep intuition that we all have: something is off, and we want to make it right.
And this is a good inclination.
We should want to adjust our lives to ensure that they’re aligned with our most deeply held values.
The issue, however, is that we assume our most deeply held values are the best values to have. We assume that our values mirror the values of the Kingdom of God, and if we’re honest, we may find that they just don’t.
No Accidental Saints
At the beginning of the year, the Church puts before us the powerhouse holy man, St. Basil the Great.
St. Basil was a theological giant, one of the greatest minds that the Church has ever seen. His treatises are many, and he has offered much that has been the source of reflection for generations of Christians. If you haven’t spent any time with his writings, I highly recommend you do so.
He wasn’t just a master of the theological, however. He was also a staunch advocate for the poor and the needy, giving up his wealth and living in voluntary poverty as he began what is arguably the first hospital. He also built something of a small city that his followers called “the Basiliad,” a place where the poor and sick could seek help, a place of education, a place of prayer.
In short, St. Basil believed the Kingdom of God was a reality, and he sought to bend his life entirely toward it.
But men like St. Basil don’t come out of nowhere. St. Basils do not happen by accident. Indeed, this is also why the Church invites us to contemplate his mother, St. Emmelia.
St. Emmelia and her husband, St. Basil the Elder, were known for their devotion to the Lord, and when we look at their family, we can clearly discern that they were the “real deal.” They didn’t just produce a son like St. Basil, they also reared several other saints who are highly renowned in the Church.
St. Gregory of Nyssa.
St. Macrina the Younger (named after her grandmother who also is a saint. By the way, her grandfather was also a Christian martyr).
St. Peter of Sebaste.
St. Naucratius.
I mean, come on. Can you imagine what family dinners were like? What did they talk about? What must their life together have looked like?
Whatever the case may be, I can imagine that Basil the Elder and Emmelia must have made it clear through their rhythms of life, their priorities, the content of the conversation, the way they spoke to their children – through everything – that the entirety of their lives and their children’s lives were to be lived before the Face of God.
In short, they led their family in such a way that the multigenerational inheritance of sainthood was their single goal for their children.
After all, there is no such thing as an accidental saint.
Let’s Metanoia — Together
And so, at the beginning of this year after eating way too many carbs, spending way too much money on material things, and encouraging my children to do the same…I’m ready for a reset.
I’m ready to repent.
With St. Basil and his family set before us, this may be the Church’s invitation for each of us to consider whether the values and rhythms of our lives actually mirror the values and rhythms of Christ and His Kingdom.
So as we all undergo the time-honored tradition of setting New Year’s resolutions and feeling shame when we break them, I want to propose a different way of thinking about it this year.
Let’s set New Year’s Repentance.
Let’s metanoia.
Together.
After all, metanoia means a “change of mind,” a change of heart. In other words, it’s not just about feeling bad about what we do and have done. Rather, it’s about seeking to engage in an entirely new way of seeing our life on this planet. It’s a commitment to an entirely new way of living.
It’s a commitment to seeing and doing things God’s way, instead of doing them our own way and rationalizing it later. I mean, let’s be honest. It’s what we all do.
It’s a commitment to seeing and doing things as His sons and daughters, as citizens of His Kingdom.
Before I offer a framework for thinking about this, take a moment and pause to ask the Lord what He may be inviting you to in this new year.
Are there some things He may be inviting you to give up? Perhaps a bad habit, an unhealthy thought pattern, a manipulative way of relating?
Are there some things He may be inviting you to take up? Perhaps a new practice of prayer, a generous heart and wallet, a renewed attention span and patience when you’re with your children?
We all have the sense that we aren’t living the way we should. That something is off somewhere. Simply be with the Lord about this, and ask Him to help you see what He is graciously inviting you to.
WHAT YOU CAN DO:
Years ago, a priest friend introduced me to a set of categories through which he made his own resolutions, and I think it’s absolutely fantastic. He called it “The 8 F’s.”
Faith.
Fun.
Family.
Friendship.
Finance.
Fitness.
“F”ocation.
“F”acation.
I know. The last two don’t start with F’s for real, but…you get it. Vocation and Vacation…
While I can’t tell you what each of these categories should hold for you, I can offer some questions to help guide your thoughts as you review the 8 F's and set your goals for repentance to be in alignment with the values of God’s Kingdom.
FAITH
Has my trust in God truly been the center of my life in the last year, or have I put my trust in other things like my own talents, treasures, and time?
Have I prioritized communion with God through a consistent rhythm of prayer, fasting, confession, and partaking of the Eucharist?
What do I wish could look different about my relationship with Christ and His Church?
FUN
What has been my idea of fun during the last year? Has it been actually restorative and life-giving, or has it been more about numbing and distracting myself from difficult things in my life?
Do I actually feel good about the ways I’ve chosen to have fun, or have they been mindless entertainments?
What activities or hobbies could I engage in this next year that actually help my soul feel rested and alive so that I can engage more fully with my life and with others?
FAMILY
How have I treated my family in the last year? Have I been patient, kind, and gentle? Or have I been short, irritable, and harsh?
Have I prioritized connecting with and serving my nearest neighbors with whom I share a home, or have I been caught up in other things that take too much of my time and energy?
How do I wish I could be with my family in such a way that the Love of God radiates from me and throughout the rest of the home?
FRIENDSHIP
What has been my relationship with my friends in the last year? Have I overly relied on them or have I been aloof in my dealings with them?
When I am with my friends, have I been there as a loving and supportive presence, or have I used them as yet another means of entertainment and distraction?
How do I wish I could love my friends in such a way that we embody Christ’s abiding presence for one another?
FINANCE
What have my spending habits looked like in the last year? If someone were to look at my bank account and see where my money goes, what would they think is important to me?
What emotions come up for me when I even think about my financial life? Anxiety? Shame? Stinginess? Pride?
What steps can I take to put the Kingdom values of Simplicity (wanting and having less) and Generosity (sharing and giving more) more into conversation with my own relationship to my money?
FITNESS
What emotions come up for me around my relationship with my own body? Do I feel ashamed of how I look? Am I overly anxious about it? Do I feel like my body is something of a status symbol?
As the closest bit of creation I’m called to care for, how have I treated my body? Have I nourished it with food that fuels it well, or have I eaten too many processed foods that leave me feeling sick all the time? Have I used substances (drugs, alcohol, tobacco, etc.) that are likely to harm my body?
What steps can I take to care for my body so that I can be healthy and energetic enough to offer my body as a living sacrifice to the Lord through my love for Him and for others?
“F”OCATION
What has been my relationship with work in the last year? Have I worked too much? Too little? How has this impacted my spiritual and emotional state?
Have I been working to gain a bit more prestige in the world, or do I work as though I’m working for the Lord and not for men?
How can I see my work life as an invitation to partner with God in the renewal of His Creation? How can I work as God’s image-bearer, as “the gardener” in “the garden” of my workplace?
“F”ACATION
What has my relationship with rest and delight looked like in the last year? Have I worked until I drop into a luxury vacation, or has my life been punctuated with a regular, weekly rhythm of rest as we’re commanded?
Have I avoided rest because my inactivity feels “unproductive” and causes me a bit of anxiety or allows space for unpleasant emotions to arise? How can I turn toward those spiritual states and emotions with curiosity instead of running from them through frenetic activity?
What steps can I take to lean more fully into a regular rhythm of rest and delight as I trust in God’s Provision and promise to fulfill His work so that I don’t burnout for those who need me or feel the need for a decadent vacation as a reward?
Friends, I hope this reflection helps you as much as it has helped me in gearing up for a new year of life in God’s Love. I pray that you will find yourself ever more fully aware of God’s generosity and love as you seek to orient yourself and your family’s life evermore toward the values of His Kingdom.